Jennifer’s Body. Directed by Karyn Kusama and written by Diablo Cody. Staring Megan Fox as Jennifer, Amanda Seyfried as Needy and Adam Brody as Nikolai. Was released in 2009 with a budget of 16 million that grossed almost 32 million worldwide.
“Hell is a teenage girl.” Yes, you read the headline correctly, I honestly do not have a reason why I have not seen the 2009 horror/comedy Jennifer’s Body in the 12 years since it’s release, but that is indeed the case until tonight. A film that was initially hammered by critics and fans alike when it was first released has have some sort of resurgence in the last handful of years. With countless of podcasts and youtube channels I follow imploring anyone who hasn’t seen it, do so immediately, I figured what the hell, lets give it a shot. Worst case scenario, Megan Fox is forever a smoke show.
The movie opens in Jennifer’s bedroom as we see our star laying on her bed watching one of those horrible late night info commercials selling shitty exercise equipment. The camera then suddenly shifts to a side view and we see a female creepily starring into the window. When Jennifer turns towards this window this woman is gone. The sequence worked like gang busters for me. I know absolutely nothing so far and I am hooked. I am then introduced to Anita aka Needy who is a mental patient in a psyche ward. Instantly I realize Needy is cracked, and fucking strong as she kicks a guard halfway across the cafeteria. The movie then shifts to the past to a time where Needy is in Highschool and she’s BFF with Jennifer. Funny when Jennifer mentions a rock concert happening later that night, she references the bands Myspace page and I immediately felt extremely old. Surprise surprise Chris Pratt is in this movie! I did not know this, cut me some slack I cant know everything. Jenn is hilarious, the back door virgin lines made me giggle. If I can be honest, yea Megan Fox is a beautiful actress but I never seen her as a good actress but I always heard she was good in this role and I can already see why people have said this. The bar that the rock show takes place in burns down in a horrible accident and Jenn leaves the burning venue with the band who doesn’t seem to give three shits in their 89′ Rapist van. Later that same night Jenn returns to Needys house covered in blood and acting quite demonic. One hell of a cool stare down into an evil smile. Tag this up with a cool score and a growling sound effect, I really dug this. Following this was an incredible sequence of events by Jenn puking up black sludge that was like road kill mixed with sowing needles and Boston Market. all while laughing and asking Needy if she was scared. Great shit. Fox totally dove head first into this role.
The next morning were back in school where Needy meets up with Jenn who seemingly is fine compared to the state she was in the night prior. Although her bitch meter is clearly at a higher level. Later on in the day we see Jenn seduce one of the guys who are mourning one of the guys who died in the bar fire. Jenn uses this grief to her advantage to trick him to come make out in the woods. While making out something occurs that I thought was very original. Dozens of different animals spring out of their habitats to come watch the make out sesh! Well what comes next is what I thought would come next, Jennifer’s Body goes total evil and the jock becomes Jenn’s lunch. Much better than Boston Market I bet. Jennifer is having the best day since Jesus invented the calendar.
Needy starts to sense a connection between the mysterious fire of the bar and this death of the star linebacker. While I appreciate the hook handed stylings of J.K. Simmons as the teacher. The movie fast forwards to one month ahead and Jenn looks tired or she may be pmsing. She looks like shit, even though still managing to look hot at the same time. Its clear that this is Megan Fox’s best role because you can tell she is barely acting. She is acting 100% herself and it shows. In result of this, it is making the believability of the movie exponentially high. Jennifer invites a poor soul to hang out with her later that evening which sets off a kill sequence that included a killer line of “Nice hardware Ace.” More importantly was the actual death sequence though that was shot by using just the shadow of the kill which I loved. The candlelight, blood splatter and grotesque sound effects made it a home run for me.
Then is where the film starts to get very interesting to me. There seems to be some sort of connection between Needy and Jennifer ie same thoughts, Needy seeing Jenn in her dreams ultimately meeting up with each other for a superhot make out session. Jenn then starts explaining to Needy what happened to her the night she got drove off with the band in the 89 Rapester. I find out that the band is planning on sacrificing Jennifer’s body to Satan for fame. As they did it singing 867-5309 which I though was comical. After killing her I learn they threw Jenn into that whirlpool hole before coming back to Needy’s house that first night.
Needy goes full blown detective and starts doing her own paranormal research for what could possibly be going on with Jennifer. Of course nobody believes her or even wants to hear her conspiracy theories due to it being the night of the big spring formal dance. Now at the dance Needy is waiting for her date to arrive but he is cut off by Jennifer. Sensing this for some non for seen reason, Needy leaves the dance in pursuit of Jennifer.
Jennifer takes Needys boyfriend to an abandoned pool of sorts where she tries to seduce him and eventually feed on him but he shuts her down because he just cant hurt Needy. This leads to Jennifer beating the shit out of him. By the time Needy arrives its seemingly too late as Jennifer has half of his bloody neck in between her razor sharp teeth. The shot looks amazing with the green and the red. Megan Fox is genially scary here. A huge brawl breaks out that ends with a giant pool skimmer impaling Jennifer. When she takes it out she asks Needy for a tampon. A line that was so well done and funny it makes me wish i had seen this in a crowded theater back in its premiere days. Jennifer escapes the scene and unfortunately Chip dies. RIP Chip.
The movie then arrives to where it started in Jennifer’s bedroom. This time instead of seeing who I now know is Needy’s face I see jump through the window in an attempt to revenge Chips death and kill Jenn. What ensues is a crazy cool ass struggle fight with a box cutter while floating in the air and ends with Needy stabbing Jennifer in the tit aka heart killing her. Right on cue Needy’s mother comes in and sees her on top of Jennifer’s dead body which explains why we met Needy in the psyche ward in the beginning. She then explains to us how if you get bit by a demon you absorb some of their powers. Which then leads to Needy escaping the hospital and eventually going after and killing the band that started all this shit from the beginning and she accomplishes just that. The End.
My gut reaction was that one, it was better than I even expected it to be as it had great acting by everyone especially of course Fox. Cool 90’s style soundtrack. Great gore effects. With a story that wrapped up perfectly without a single damn complaint. The only negative i could say about it is it could have benefitted from being maybe 15 minutes shorter as I could have done without all the empty scenes of the band playing music. But that is nothing to take away the enjoyment of the movie. This was a funny, bloody, great first watch oh what will be a classic in the 2000’s horror spectrum.
4 Skulls out of 5 for Jennifer’s Body
IMDB Fun Facts
The waterfall portal in the movie actually exists in Judge Magney State Park in Minnesota
To prepare for the role of this demon Megan Fox lost 15 lbs to go down to 97 lbs and stayed out of the sun as much as she could.
The films popularity has grown over the years even garnering a musical in 2018.
By Hugh Patrick (Terrified State)
Terrified State 